Do you Drive??
I mean do you drive a four-wheeler or ride a two-wheeler?
NO, I am not being judgemental or anything here? I am just curious to find out if you are going to be able to relate to what I am going to share here.
I start at the word "drive" for two particular reasons. First, apart from writing, driving is another thing I simply love. Like brown paper packets, ribbons & yellow lights...Me behind a set of wheels with a rising morning sun running besides me on an open road is one of my most favorite things. Second, drive as a word stands for energy, push & aggressive ness- all three also my favorite things.
I have stumbled upon some beautiful places, people, events while driving many kms. And also I have been lucky to hit some fascinating thoughts, emotions and feelings in the same distance. There is a mechanical autonomy about driving which one most obviously masters in the first 1000 or so kms of one's driving life. Thereafter it is either a mundane boring activity or an escapade set to break you free.
There was a phase in my life some 3years ago when I learnt the difference. I started driving on my 18th birthday and have driven close about 1.25lac kms already. And I had always enjoyed the verb of driving, but that particular summer of 2011, I started reveling in the noun of driving. I was in those days, struggling with some very basic emotions in life. Stifled between definitions of love, care, relationships, money and their actual practices. Every morning was a struggle- a struggle to know the difference and accept it. There was absolutely no sanity inside the closed walls of home and there was more threat or loss outside anyways. Yet one had to wake up, dress up and show up to the worldly duties, call of the hours and more routine jobs.
I used to actually look forward to just getting out of the flat,sitting in my car, locking myself in and drive away. On mostly the same stretch between home and office, because of its familiarity. They were those kind of days, when you stick to a routine for purpose of familiarity and averting any more challenges than what you are grappling with already. My days were so heavy that this was perhaps the only time, I felt fabulous about my life - the time I was driving by myself. I felt totally in control of all events, just like I was of the steering wheel. These were the times, when questions will ripple in the mind and the entire world would be scourged for answers in all possible corners of the mind. There would be dialogues with God, on when would He show me the signs, where would all this lead me to. All my emotions would surge during this morning drive to work. I often had to park a few meters before my office parking lot and drink some water, do-up my kajal, clean the remnants of all the crying and only then carry on towards office. I avoided talking to anybody at this time, coz it actually became my time to drive myself- 60 kms, nearly 2 hrs everyday with Delhi's infamous peak hour traffic.
By now it was May and Delhi was burning hot. If anybody remembers how hot it was in May 2011, you would know what I mean by burning. And I was stuck at the Gurgaon toll Plaza for about 40mins on the carriageway towards Gurgaon. If you have never driven in a similar condition or in this particular condition, you cannot imagine what it does to you at 9am every morning of your life. But as the chaos cleared on NH-8 right after Ambience Mall and all motorists sped up the following flyovers, one particular thing caught my eye. A bunch of Red against the concrete backdrop of a few bungalows on one's left hand side only a few meters before the IFFCO Chowk exit. There it was aganst some patchy green, a blob of bright red. Feisty yet Fragile, in this May heat.
It was as if I saw LIFE. It was as if it was waving like a flag for me. As if I should stop and acknowledge this burst of color specially done for me.
Red has always been a favorite- for various reasons. But that day it came to me as a SIGN. A sign of burning. A sign of bleeding. A sign of winning. A sign of whining. A sign of accomplishment. A sign of accord. It came up as if to say, "Soh, look for me around you. If you seek me, you will find me. I am blooming all over and I am looking for you. In this intolerable heat we shall bloom together."
And then it was gone. Obviously. Cause we are all at about 100kmph at that point trying to avoid the bottlenecks at all exits. Though I zoomed past it in no time, it stayed that day with me. And that night too. And in a tone inspired by Woodsworth I can say, "The red in my soul I bore, Long after it was seen no more."
Next morning when I was getting ready for office, I made up my mind that I will go slow today on the stretch to absorb the sight even more. So, when I started driving that day I had only one intention- to quickly go through the first 50kms and reach that spot asap. There was a zest in my morning, a hope in my heart- that it was going to be a great drive. So I sat in my car, turn the ignition on, pulled the reverse gear and pulled out of my parking lot. Lo & behold- there it was. Less than 30meters from where I lived. The same bunch of Red. How long it must have been there that I never noticed it? As I turned to my left just outside my gated community I noticed another one across the road on my right. Oh My God. They were everywhere, waiting for me to notice them.
The GULMOHAR TREES were actually everywhere that day. I saw them just before I took the DND, then at Maharani Bagh, South Extn, Rao Tula Ram Magh and then as the traffic took right toward USI club & AWWA hostel before hitting the NH-8. And on that day when I had set out to see that one tree near IFFCO chowk and I was determined to reach there earliest possible- I could see them everywhere. As if they were now in a hurry to see me too.
It turned out to be a brilliant day with a fantastic drive to office that day. Actually I felt a part of me bloom in search of more gulmohar in the subsequent days. Its the third summer since then, and though I live in Mumbai now where you see far lesser trees than in Delhi, I consider myself lucky that roads on my way to office every morning are now in full GULMOHAR bloom.
Every year now I actually look forward to the month of May, when my favorite bunch of Reds come alive and make me feel that its time unfurl a new leaf, a new season and a new bloom. I have restless days ahead of the Gulmohar's flowering time, a run up since March when the leaves come on and that palpable excitement to see the first flowers come up. It makes me want to bring about another beautiful change - new chapters, new books & new episodes of life.
So if you see a Gulmohar in full bloom tomorrow or day after(as they are currently everywhere), please do remember me. Remember to connect with the Feisty Flame of the Forest and Fan your inner flames with the swinging of the branches laden with these flowers. And remember to look for them every passing year. They will be heralding a change that we all so eagerly wait for. Year After Year.
And where we started. About the Driving. Drive Yourself. Drive yourself to a new season of changes. It has to come from within. There will be signs on the roads to guide you- Some organic & some inorganic. But they will be there, in Red, Green & Blue. Look out for them and go for them. Your journey will only be yours.
Stay Well. Stay Loved. Stay Blessed.
Soh
I mean do you drive a four-wheeler or ride a two-wheeler?
NO, I am not being judgemental or anything here? I am just curious to find out if you are going to be able to relate to what I am going to share here.
I start at the word "drive" for two particular reasons. First, apart from writing, driving is another thing I simply love. Like brown paper packets, ribbons & yellow lights...Me behind a set of wheels with a rising morning sun running besides me on an open road is one of my most favorite things. Second, drive as a word stands for energy, push & aggressive ness- all three also my favorite things.
I have stumbled upon some beautiful places, people, events while driving many kms. And also I have been lucky to hit some fascinating thoughts, emotions and feelings in the same distance. There is a mechanical autonomy about driving which one most obviously masters in the first 1000 or so kms of one's driving life. Thereafter it is either a mundane boring activity or an escapade set to break you free.
There was a phase in my life some 3years ago when I learnt the difference. I started driving on my 18th birthday and have driven close about 1.25lac kms already. And I had always enjoyed the verb of driving, but that particular summer of 2011, I started reveling in the noun of driving. I was in those days, struggling with some very basic emotions in life. Stifled between definitions of love, care, relationships, money and their actual practices. Every morning was a struggle- a struggle to know the difference and accept it. There was absolutely no sanity inside the closed walls of home and there was more threat or loss outside anyways. Yet one had to wake up, dress up and show up to the worldly duties, call of the hours and more routine jobs.
I used to actually look forward to just getting out of the flat,sitting in my car, locking myself in and drive away. On mostly the same stretch between home and office, because of its familiarity. They were those kind of days, when you stick to a routine for purpose of familiarity and averting any more challenges than what you are grappling with already. My days were so heavy that this was perhaps the only time, I felt fabulous about my life - the time I was driving by myself. I felt totally in control of all events, just like I was of the steering wheel. These were the times, when questions will ripple in the mind and the entire world would be scourged for answers in all possible corners of the mind. There would be dialogues with God, on when would He show me the signs, where would all this lead me to. All my emotions would surge during this morning drive to work. I often had to park a few meters before my office parking lot and drink some water, do-up my kajal, clean the remnants of all the crying and only then carry on towards office. I avoided talking to anybody at this time, coz it actually became my time to drive myself- 60 kms, nearly 2 hrs everyday with Delhi's infamous peak hour traffic.
By now it was May and Delhi was burning hot. If anybody remembers how hot it was in May 2011, you would know what I mean by burning. And I was stuck at the Gurgaon toll Plaza for about 40mins on the carriageway towards Gurgaon. If you have never driven in a similar condition or in this particular condition, you cannot imagine what it does to you at 9am every morning of your life. But as the chaos cleared on NH-8 right after Ambience Mall and all motorists sped up the following flyovers, one particular thing caught my eye. A bunch of Red against the concrete backdrop of a few bungalows on one's left hand side only a few meters before the IFFCO Chowk exit. There it was aganst some patchy green, a blob of bright red. Feisty yet Fragile, in this May heat.
It was as if I saw LIFE. It was as if it was waving like a flag for me. As if I should stop and acknowledge this burst of color specially done for me.
Red has always been a favorite- for various reasons. But that day it came to me as a SIGN. A sign of burning. A sign of bleeding. A sign of winning. A sign of whining. A sign of accomplishment. A sign of accord. It came up as if to say, "Soh, look for me around you. If you seek me, you will find me. I am blooming all over and I am looking for you. In this intolerable heat we shall bloom together."
And then it was gone. Obviously. Cause we are all at about 100kmph at that point trying to avoid the bottlenecks at all exits. Though I zoomed past it in no time, it stayed that day with me. And that night too. And in a tone inspired by Woodsworth I can say, "The red in my soul I bore, Long after it was seen no more."
Next morning when I was getting ready for office, I made up my mind that I will go slow today on the stretch to absorb the sight even more. So, when I started driving that day I had only one intention- to quickly go through the first 50kms and reach that spot asap. There was a zest in my morning, a hope in my heart- that it was going to be a great drive. So I sat in my car, turn the ignition on, pulled the reverse gear and pulled out of my parking lot. Lo & behold- there it was. Less than 30meters from where I lived. The same bunch of Red. How long it must have been there that I never noticed it? As I turned to my left just outside my gated community I noticed another one across the road on my right. Oh My God. They were everywhere, waiting for me to notice them.
The GULMOHAR TREES were actually everywhere that day. I saw them just before I took the DND, then at Maharani Bagh, South Extn, Rao Tula Ram Magh and then as the traffic took right toward USI club & AWWA hostel before hitting the NH-8. And on that day when I had set out to see that one tree near IFFCO chowk and I was determined to reach there earliest possible- I could see them everywhere. As if they were now in a hurry to see me too.
It turned out to be a brilliant day with a fantastic drive to office that day. Actually I felt a part of me bloom in search of more gulmohar in the subsequent days. Its the third summer since then, and though I live in Mumbai now where you see far lesser trees than in Delhi, I consider myself lucky that roads on my way to office every morning are now in full GULMOHAR bloom.
Every year now I actually look forward to the month of May, when my favorite bunch of Reds come alive and make me feel that its time unfurl a new leaf, a new season and a new bloom. I have restless days ahead of the Gulmohar's flowering time, a run up since March when the leaves come on and that palpable excitement to see the first flowers come up. It makes me want to bring about another beautiful change - new chapters, new books & new episodes of life.
So if you see a Gulmohar in full bloom tomorrow or day after(as they are currently everywhere), please do remember me. Remember to connect with the Feisty Flame of the Forest and Fan your inner flames with the swinging of the branches laden with these flowers. And remember to look for them every passing year. They will be heralding a change that we all so eagerly wait for. Year After Year.
And where we started. About the Driving. Drive Yourself. Drive yourself to a new season of changes. It has to come from within. There will be signs on the roads to guide you- Some organic & some inorganic. But they will be there, in Red, Green & Blue. Look out for them and go for them. Your journey will only be yours.
Stay Well. Stay Loved. Stay Blessed.
Soh
2 comments:
what a perspective ! yes - will always remember you when I see Gulmohar trees now! :)
That's a very interesting perspective. Gulmohars have a very different meaning for me. You see, Gulmohar trees start blooming in my birth month and are in full bloom by birthday. Every time I see a gulmohar tree in full bloom, I feel like nature's special child – like it’s the universe’s way of wishing me a very happy birthday!
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